Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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