If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
