I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
