I hate all girls vehemently.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
