there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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