Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize