I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
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god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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