I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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