I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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