marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
