There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
