i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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