Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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