I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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