I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
