i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You have to summon your inner elephant
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Randomize