she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
