Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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