I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i tasted like america
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize