They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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