My room smells like vodka and shame
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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