She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
