just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
