soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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