I got chris browned last night
That's when you crack a 10am beer
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
