I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
They took my balls.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
