We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
