so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
bring money and cleavage
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize