Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i would punch a child for taco bell
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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