There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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