i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
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