I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
