i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
