hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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