I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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