Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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