you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize