i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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