puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
