i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.