Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
