so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I just gift wrapped bread.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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