is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Fuck appropriateness.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Randomize
