Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Randomize
