Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize