Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.

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(816): View more from Missouri

She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"

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(203): View more from Connecticut

are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?

(203): View more from Connecticut

bc i get to see you. naked.

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(740): View more from Ohio

How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?

(1-740): View more from Ohio

2.5

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(203): View more from Connecticut

i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?

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(705): View more from Ontario

I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.

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(303): View more from Colorado

how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????

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(315): View more from New York

Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.

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