Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
