i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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