Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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