There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
