Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Randomize