If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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